Write a brief account of Sir Roger's love affair as described by Steele


Question: What impressions have you formed of Sir Roger and the widow from the essays which deal with the love affair of Sir Roger.

Or, Write a brief account of Sir Roger's love affair as described by Steele.

Answer: It was in his twenty-third year that Sir Roger fell in love with a beautiful woman. He first saw her in his court where she had come in connection with the hearing of a case relating to her inheritance. She was clothed in a widow's garments. Sir Roger felt captivated by the widow the moment she cast a look upon him. Subsequently, Sir Roger learnt that the widow had a large number of admirers but that she had not given encouragement to any one of them. Somebody told Sir Roger that the window had formed a better opinion of him than of any other man of her acquaintance. Encouraged by this bit of information, Sir Roger overhauled his whole equipment, bought new liveries for his attendants and called her residence in order to pay court to her. He was admitted of her presence with a show of considerable respect, and she presented herself to him in a posture that revealed new charms. Sir Roger was filled with such awe on seeing her that he could hardly speak a word. Observing Sir Roger's embarrassment, she began to speak to him on the subject of love and honour and gave expression to her views regarding the distinction between false and true lovers, and between a true sense of honour and a false sense of honour. Sir Roger being in no position to utter a single word, the widow's confidant tauntingly observed that he would express all his ideas and feelings at one stroke as soon as he could make up his mind to speak. After sitting for half an hour without knowing what to say Roger got up and left.

Since that first visit, Sir Roger had often met the widow, though only by chance. Each time they met, she addressed to him a discourse the meaning of which he could not understand. He found her hard-hearted, and her cruel attitude left no alternative for him but to keep away from her, even though he thought he to be the most beautiful person in the world. His disappointment in love, says Sir Roger, has left a permanent mark on him and is the real cause of that inconsistency which appears in some parts of his talk. His passion for her has, to some extent, unbalanced his mind so that he often says something absurd of irrational which amuses the listeners. But this disappointment; has also produced a beneficent effect on him. It is on account of this disappointment that he has developed an attitude of lenience towards people and is always willing to forgive the erring ones. But he knows that he can never be completely cured of this passion. Whenever he thinks of her, he gets the feeling that his youth has returned.

Sir Roger is so awed by this widow's superior qualities that he has to restrain himself from giving vent to his feelings of love for her. He has often wished her to be faced with some difficulty so that he can have an opportunity of going to her aid, and yet at the same time, he does not want her to be weighed down by a feeling of obligation to him.

The widow's rejection of Sir Roger has made his life miserable but he feels that she would have responded to his love if her confidant had not instigated her against him. Most ladies, who are rich or beautiful, discourage their suitors because their confidants do not want them to get married. A beautiful lady's confidant generally behaves towards the lady's suitors with a good deal of reserve. A rich lady's confidant behaves towards the lady's suitors with air do doubt and suspicion. A confidant generally behaves as if she were herself the woman being wooed. For this reason, a lady's confidant is, according to Sir Roger, deserving of the utmost contempt. She acquires a strong hold on the mind of the lady and controls her actions. The result is that the only freedom that a lady has is the freedom of talking to her confidant about the male sex in general, without having the freedom to converse freely with her suitors. Thus a suitor must strive to please and win the favour of the confidant and not the lady herself.

Steele employs a lot of irony in his portrayal of Sir Roger as the perverse lady's suitor. We find that Sir Roger is no gallant. He is not what is known as a "ladies' man". He is incapable of whispering those sweet words into the ears of a woman that can charm her and stir a response in her heart. He has always found himself tongue-tied in the presence of the beautiful widow who has captivated his heart. Of course, he tries to deck himself out in bright colours when he calls on the widow to pay his addresses to her. But he feels so awed by her charms and her excellent qualities that he is unable to speak anything. The widow has naturally formed a poor opinion, of Sir Roger as a lover. It is a pity while Sir Roger deeply admires the lady's beauty and her other wonderful qualities, he is unable to make any headway towards the lady's heart. His disappointment in love is remembered by him as a great affliction and he cannot forget the cruel manner in which he was treated by the widow. His tall stature, good horsemanship, and elegant clothes, all failed to produce a favourable impression on her. But though we feel a certain pity for the fate of Sir Roger, we also feel amused by his deficiencies and the failure in love we have here.

We are greatly struck by the widow's beauty and charm. Sir Roger recalls how he used to carve the name of the widow on the bark of trees. He regarded her as having the finest hand in the world. She was one of those strange creatures who secretly rejoice in the attention they receive from their admirers but do not give any encouragement to them. The reason why she did not respond to any of the advances of her suitors, was that she did not have a good opinion of the male sex in general. Her particular skill lay in inflaming men's desires without responding to their sentiments. She was successful in this game because of her vast knowledge, her ready wit, her wide reading, and her good sense. There was such a combination of qualities in her that an admirer was filled with both hope and fear with regard to the outcome of his courtship of her. In the case of Sir Roger, she found him by nature shy and diffident, and she took great pleasure in embarrassing him. She spoke to him of matters about which he had little knowledge and which he did not clearly understand. Rumour had it that her heart was fixed on someone of another but there was no evidence to support this rumour. The widow had a very sweet voice and could sing excellently. Her speech was like music, and, her shape and form were angelic. Nobody could remain unconcerned at the perfection that she presented. According to Sir Roger, no man could possess her. She was beautiful beyond the reach of men. She had a commanding personality. It seemed that she was born for the destruction of all who saw her. She knew all the arts and artifices of coquetry. There was something in her person that did not permit any man to annoy or offend her. She was so conscious of her own excellent qualities that no man dared to insult her in retaliation for being rejected by her. But, in spite of all her admirable qualities, the widow was very much under the influence of her confidant. According to Sir Roger, it was her confidant that had poisoned her mind against him. She was always accompanied by her confidant to whom she communicated all her secret opinions and views about the male sex. The widow's natural cruelty combined with the evil influence that her confidant exercised on her prevented her from marrying anybody. 

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